Sister texted a little while ago. She is having a hard time. She wants to know what to do when your inner demons are coming out and fiddling with your personal relationships. My parents allowed her to stay with me a few nights ago. This was the first time since they kicked me out of my child hood home. She went to work with me the next day. She definitely had mood swings and was easily triggered. The next day, she went to a ball game with our parents. After some distressing events, she had an anxiety attack. Dad was mad at her because she couldn’t stop crying.
She sent me the text while sitting beside my mother in church. My sweet sister also said that mom was angry with her, because the tears wouldn’t stop coming. After all these years, how have my parents not figured out the art of attempting some kind of compassion and understanding?
She feels alone. She doesn’t know what to do. She asks me… if only I had some kind of solid answer for her. I told her to take the time she needs for self care. That seems basic, but that child, like many of us, will run herself to death taking care of others before helping herself. I told her to give it a few days. One thing I have learned on my own journey is waiting. Waiting is one of the most difficult but necessary aspects of life. I want her to wait just a few days to see if anything changes. Getting caught up in the moment, or a bad time snares the most level headed of us all. Time speaks truth. Lastly, I admonished her to ask for help. She should pick someone and get the help she needs.
These are my general steps for handling difficult times of depression, but they are not guaranteed. This truth crushes my very soul. I cannot offer her anything solid. She must find her own foundation, her own ground, and her own methods. Knowing she struggles, it hurts. Knowing, hoping, and praying she will find her way… that is what I must do. That is what we all must do. I won’t give up on her. I will strive to be there for her in every way possible; that much I can guarantee.
I wanted to write but not edit. So here we have it. Cheers!